It's Christmas eve 2013 and all the planning for your last visit is going thru my mind. I can clearly remember the secret phone calls, the planning on how to surprise your mother, making your mother belive I mailed you your gifts. The day was a BIG hit and everything went off as planned, I can remember your smile, the conversations we all had. What sticks out most was dinner, you ate like you haven't been fed in over a month, you ended the meal by saying there is nothing like a good home cooked dinner. I remember your mother being upset because we did not have any gifts for you and finally explaining to Her that we did and why, caught Hell for that because we all kept your visit a secret. If I knew than what I know now I would not have let you go back to your house and we would all be enjoying another Christmas, but GOD had other plans for you.
I spoke of you today to my college student bible class. Our Navy friends may remember, 9 times out of 10 you followed me on the underway watch rotation. You could never make it to watch on time. What I would give to be standing an exta hour of watch knowing you were just down in berthing still asleep. I also remembered you and Andy Schwenkhoff in the Sonar 5 pway. To let the friends and family know, the Yorktown's greatest enemy was not al qaeda or drug smugglers, It was dust and our humble pway was it's main target. Anyway we were in our bi weekly all hands clean the pway mode. I don't remember what it was over, but all of a sudden Doug and Spanky are going at each other. All of a sudden Doug goes, "You know what Spanky, you're like a giant hemroid, a pain in my.... " Well I don't use those words anymore but I'm sure you can all fill in the last part. I literally doubled over laughing as it was one of the funniest random statements I've ever heard. I find it ironic that you are in heaven waiting on me, I'll see you someday my brother, save me a seat up front before his throne.
Today 11-11-11 and you would have been 35 years old, as I think about this all sorts of pictures come into my mind. I have pictures of you as a very young two year old with your curly blond hair, the determined look on your face at soccer and the I didn’t do it look when something wasn’t right. As I remember the pictures I can go from a very small baby to a grown man, I can remember seeing you for the first time and sadly the last time all these images are running in my head and will not stop. Pictures of you and Debbie making up some sort of devilish plot and trying to hide it from your mother and I, the look on your faces is priceless and will forever be with me. Memories are all I have now. LOVE DAD
I am sitting here remembering the day you were born, actually the night before. Dad was trying to hammer a nail in the wall in the living room to hang a picture above the couch, but the wall stud was not where it should have. I remember Mom talking about how her back hurt and that she was glad that in the morning she was going to have you. We left early, the sun was barely up. After Mom went up in the wheelchair, Dad took Tommy and I to the cafeteria of the hospital to have breakfast. Some sort of powdered eggs and juice, yuk. LoL. You were born later and I still remember the smile on Dad's face. The proud look. Back then life was different. kids couldnt go visit and see a baby that was just born. So, i remember going home that afternoon and wondering about you. Would you have hair? What color? Would you like me? All sorts of things a toddler thinks about I guess.
Back in my room at home I remembering looking through my dolls clothes and wondering if any would fit you. LoL. I heard Dad finishing up things in the living room and making sure your room in the den was all ready. I really dont know if he slept at all!
I remember the car ride home from the hospital. Mom had you in the front seat and I was looking over at you and being yelled at to sit down. LOL. Then I saw it...in your mouth... you had teeth! Mom told me to just sit down and stop talking (yeah, RIGHT, nothing short of duct tape can keep me from talking!lol) but I insisted she look in your mouth. and she did. She was shocked. the look on her face was priceless. Even better was the look you gave me, deep in to my eyes. God, that was 34 years ago Doug, and I still remember it as if it was yesterday. It was like you were looking deep in to my sole and becoming a part of me. Such an amazing feeling that was.And you did become a part of me.
Over the years you became my best friend... my doll to dress up sometimes too ;-) we became partners in crime and would always back each other up when Mom would be mad at something that we tried to get away with... she never knew which one of us REALLy did something, because we both took the blame! LOL. This continued on as teenagers and even as young adults.
Doug, from birth you became a part of my heart and soul. You have always been a huge part of who I have been and who I am today. I wish you were here, I am very incomplete without you.
Here's to all the memories, have a drink for me up there... how about you make it that final drink we had together? The Jolly Rancher... the one the bar tender was suppose to have made as a shot and didnt realize it so she made the whole batch of it and then left it for us to drink as regular bar drinks, rather than a shot! And of course, far be it for us to waste it ;-)
Happy Birthday Doug. I love you
Four Years ago today, we were on the phone laughing and joking about "Rent a Husband" and how it sounded like some weird way of single women can get out of the awkward so when are you getting married conversations with relatives. We sang happy birthday to you and Bobby on speaker phone and made plans to hang out over the holidays. How I miss saying "hey buddy" and hearing Hey you in return. Happy Birthday Buddy.....
